With all these ship designs coming out with philosophers' names, I just had
to send this. With apologies to Monty Python, I present:
The Starship Pilot's Philosopher Drinking Song
The starship "Kant" had a power plant
Which was very rarely stable
"Heidegger", "Heidegger" was a clumsy beggar
Which was unmanoeuverable
"David Hume" made toxic fumes
Like "Schopenhauer" and "Hegel"
But "Wittgenstein" was really just fine
Till it rammed into the "Schlegel"
No-one ever flies the "Nietzsche"
Unless he really, truly must
"Socrates", itself, has virtually no thrust
The "John Stuart Mill", always will
Be regarded by Zhodani as a very easy kill
"Plato", they say, went its own sweet way
Flew into a class M star one day
"Aristotle", "Aristotle" had a very dodgy throttle
"Hobbes"' one always jams
And the "Rene Descartes" will never start
Without several nasty bangs
But the "Socrates" itself, well and truly missed
When it tried to do a jump but did a triple roll and twist.
- --
"Keyboard? How quaint!" - M. Scott
Adrian Hurt | JANET: [email removed]
UUCP: ..!uknet!cee.hw.ac.uk!adrian | ARPA: [email removed]