This is an article I wrote to expand on the idea of hitch-hiking.
I have yet to have time to update it for TNE.
The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Imperium is a wholly remarkable book.
In fact, it is probably the most remarkable book to come out of the
great publishing corporations of Core Sector.
Not only is a wholly remarkable book, it is also a highly successful
one--more popular than the Basic Traveller Set, better selling than
Supplement 3: The Spinward Marches, and more controversial than the
assissination of Emperor Strephon, Shattered Ships of the Fighting
Imperium, or the Virus.
In many of the more relaxed civilizations on the spinward edge of the
Imperium, the Hitch-Hiker's Guide has supplanted the Imperial
Encyclopedia as the standard repository of all knowledge, for though
it has many omissions and contains much that is apocryphal, or at least
widely innaccurate, it scores over the older, more pedestrian work in
two important respects.
Firstly, it is slightly cheaper; and second, it has the words "Don't
Panic" inscriped in large, friendly letters on its rugged carrying case.
Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy:
TL___Vol__________Weight___Price_
11 0.2 liters 0.5 kg Cr 200
The Guide is an electronic book, packaged with a rugged carrying case with
some printing on the front, and a carrying strap. It features a mini-
screen with full-color graphics, optional stereo sound, and a small mini-
keyboard.
The Guide is a work that is continually being updated by roving reporters.
This "elite" group of "highly" skilled observers roam the Imperium, seeking
out ways to see the Imperium for less than thirty credits a day. They
send in updates to their local branch office, which edits them and relays
them on up to the central office in Core sector. These generally make it
into a new edition of the Guide about every ten years. Updates cost
Cr 20, and are packed in a small cartridge, which is inserted into a slot
on the back of the Guide.
Here is a sample of only a few of the many chapter titles from the Guide.
How to Leave Your Planet
Your Towel and You
Hoopy and Other Hitch-Hiker Lingo Explained
The Best Drink in Existence--the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
How to Eat Free by Pretending to be a Health Inspector
Simple and Cheap Treatments for Food Poisoning
Vargr Poetry and How to Avoid It
Planet of the Ballpoint Pens
What to Do if You Find Yourself Stuck in a Crack in the Ground Underneath
a Giant Boulder You Can't Move, with no Hope of Rescue.
The Universe--Some Information to Help You Live in It.
Obviously, some of these chapters are more topical than others. One can of
course read the chapters in order, which might take several lifetimes. More
likely, you can search by subject heading. The relevant task role is:
To look something up in the Guide:
Routine, Int, Edu, 2 sec (uncertain).
Referee: The information contained in the Guide is often rather inaccurate.
For this reason, this task is made uncertain. For example, in the most recent
edition of the Guide, the information on the policy of Tukera lines regarding
stowaways failed to be updated, resulting in the untimely demise to date of
over thirty Hitch-Hikers, each of them tossed into space.
The Guide has this to say about Towels:
A towel is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker
can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you
for warmth; you can lie on it; you can sleep under it; use it to sail a
miniraft; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to
ward off noxious fumes; you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress
signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean
enough.
More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason,
if a strag (strag: nonhitch-hiker) discovers that a hitch-hiker has his
towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession
of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball
of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, vacc suit, etc., etc. Furthermore,
the strag will then happily lend the hitch-hiker any of these or a dozen
other items that the hitch-hiker might accidentally have "lost." What the
strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the
Imperium, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and
still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
Towel:
TL___Weight___Vol___Price
2 -- -- Cr 5
Hitch-Hiker Lingo tends to be frought with colorful euphemisms, partly because
such talk impresses the hell out of strags. For example, rather than simply
say that she has a great deal of respect for someone, a Hitch-Hiker would say:
"Sass that hoopy _______? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is."
Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with. Hoopy: Really together guy.
Frood: Really amazingly together guy.
A similar and more frustrating example is the tendency of Hitch-Hikers to
refer to all communicators, but most especially those of Far Orbit range, as
"thumbs." This origin of this term is lost in obscurity, but this hasn't
prevented willy advertising executives from marking perfectly normal radios
under the brand name Thumb for over twice the price. Only a strag would buy
a Thumb brand thumb. Hitch-Hiker's use their "thumb's" to ask ships in orbit
for a lift. This is especially useful when stuck on some backwater planet,
with no decent surface to orbit transportation system.
The goal of the Hitch-Hiker is to see the Imperium on less than thirty credits
a day. It doesn't take long to see that even travelling low isn't cheap
enough to stick to such a budget. Their are several means Hitch-Hikers have
at their disposal to accomplish their goal:
Stoaway - this is perhaps the means that first springs to mind, but it is in
many ways undesirable. Some contend that it is contrary to the
very nature of Hitch-Hiking, not because it is dishonest, but rather
because the real challenge of Hitch-Hiking, these people insist,
consists in persuading some unwilling merchant officer to let you
on board. Nonetheless, it is available as a means of last resort.
To discover a stoaway on board a vessel.
Routine, Steward/Hitch, Int, 2 min (confrontation).
Referee: The Steward/Hitch indicates that in this confrontation task roll,
the Steward applies his Steward skill, while the Hitch-Hiker applies her Hitch
skill. One attempt can be made per day. Upon discovery, the Hitch-Hiker must
roll for the captain's reaction, applying her Hitch skill as a DM. A result of
actively uncooperative or hostile behaviour will result in spacing. The
stoaway is forced out the airlock without a spacesuit. Potential stoaways
should realize that cargo holds are often depressurized during a trip.
The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Imperium says that if you hold a lungful of air
you can survive in the total vacuum of space for about thirty seconds. However,
it does go on to say that what with space being the mind-boggling size it is the
chances of being picked up by another ship within those thirty seconds are two
to the power of two hundred and seventy-six thousand, seven hundred and nine to
one against.
Hijacking - this is even a worse idea than stoing away. Shame on you for
even thinking of it. Just make sure not to steal Hot Black
Desaitor's Stunt Ship.
Working Passage - this is an extremely common way for Hitch-Hikers to travel.
It is for this reason that players would do well to accumulate
at least minimal skill in such areas as steward, in order
to give them fighting chance at such a job. There are some
Hitch-Hikers who are too proud to take a working passage, as
if smacks too much of working for a living.
To locate a ship with a position available:
Variable, Int, Hitch, (30 min).
Referee: This skill is of variable difficulty, depending on the local starport
classification. If StarPort A - Routine,
StarPort B - Difficult,
StarPort C - Formidable.
StarPort D- - Impossible
To persuade a starship captain to give you a working passage:
Difficult, Int, Hitch, (confrontation, uncertain).
Referee: If Extremely Cooperative results, the captain will offer the Hitch-
Hiker the passage. If Neutral results, the captain will ask for the Hitch-
Hiker to come for a second interview later. Otherwise, the captain will
refuse to consider the Hitch-Hiker for the position.
Courier - small, fragile cargoes may be escorted from one star system to
another in exchange for a big rebate on a middle passage, say
Cr 2,000 instead of Cr 8,000. Still, this is not as cheap as going
low, though rather a good deal more pleasant.
Teasers - teasers are rich kids with too much time on their hands and big
expensive yachts. They like Hitch-Hikers because when they hang
around with them, they feel adventurous. Hitch-Hikers like teasers
because they provide them with a way of getting from point A to
point B without having to work for it. Make sure to show them your
copy of the Guide and your towel, and watch their eyes bug out.
To locate a teaser:
Variable, Int, Hitch (60 min).
Referee: This skill is of variable difficulty, depending on the local starport
classification. If StarPort A - Difficult
StarPort B - Formidable
StarPort C- - Impossible.
To persuade a teaser to give you a lift:
Routine, Int, Hitch, (confrontation, uncertain).
Referee: If Extremely Cooperative results, the teaser will be willing to give
you, in addition to a lift, a small infusion of cash, in order to help replace
all of the gnat spray you lost on your trip over the falls of Beta Five.